There’s a peculiar human impulse to wish for the downfall of those who’ve wronged us. We nurse grudges, fantasize about karma catching up with our antagonists, and sometimes actively hope for their suffering. But here’s an uncomfortable truth that mathematics and probability quietly whisper: if you live long enough and know enough people, you’ll inevitably witness the suffering of everyone you’ve ever disliked—not because the universe is just, but because suffering is universal and time is patient.
The Arithmetic of Misfortune
Think about the sheer number of people you encounter throughout a lifetime. Childhood classmates, college roommates, coworkers, neighbors, romantic partners, their friends, your friends’ enemies. Over decades, this network expands into hundreds or thousands of people. Now consider that every human being will experience loss, illness, failure, heartbreak, and eventually death. These aren’t exceptional events—they’re statistical certainties.If you maintain even passing awareness of fifty people from your past, the probability that several of them will face serious hardship in any given year approaches certainty. It’s not divine intervention or karmic justice. It’s just the law of large numbers playing out across human lives.
The Randomness of Suffering
The person who humiliated you in high school might get divorced. Your toxic former boss might lose their job. The friend who betrayed you might develop a chronic illness. And when these things happen, it’s tempting to feel vindicated, to believe that somehow your anger or their wrongdoing summoned this consequence. But suffering doesn’t discriminate based on moral worth. The kindest person you know will also face tragedy. So will you.This randomness strips schadenfreude of its meaning. You didn’t cause their misfortune by wishing for it. The universe didn’t hear your prayers for karma. Life simply happened to them the way it happens to everyone—sometimes brutally, always eventually.
The Emotional Toll of Waiting for Revenge
When you invest energy in hoping for someone’s downfall, you’re essentially volunteering to carry them with you through time. They occupy mental real estate, shape your emotional landscape, and influence how you interpret random events. You’re giving them power over your inner life long after they’ve stopped thinking about you.And when that inevitable bad news finally arrives? The satisfaction is surprisingly hollow. You might feel a brief spark of vindication, but it’s quickly followed by the recognition that their suffering doesn’t undo your pain. It doesn’t rewrite history or restore what was lost. It’s just additional suffering in a world already saturated with it.
The Better Alternative
If misfortune is inevitable and random, then praying for it is pointless. But more than that, it’s a waste of the finite attention and emotional energy you have. The people who wronged you will face their own struggles without your involvement. Time will see to that, as impartially as it sees to everyone’s struggles.
The more difficult and more meaningful work is letting them fade from your concern entirely—not because you’ve forgiven them or because they deserve your indifference, but because your life is too valuable to spend it mentally tracking people you hope will suffer. They’re already suffering. Everyone is. That’s the human condition.Your energy is better spent building something worth caring about, connecting with people who matter to you now, and recognizing that in a universe where hardship is guaranteed and random, the only thing you truly control is what you do with your own limited time.
In the end, you don’t need to pray for anyone’s downfall. Entropy, illness, loss, and mortality are already handling that work with perfect efficiency. The real question is: what will you do with the time and peace of mind you reclaim by letting go?
