I’m not inclined to trust a lot of people. A lot of them really suck in my experience. I’ve had people betray me in every single way, and also try to attack me physically. I have a short temper and am always on guard. Just talking about certain places or people is triggering for me, although I don’t subscribe to PTSD lingo. I keep to myself, and right now all I do is work so that I can live a better future. I’m very guarded and am quick to excise people from my life if they make me feel discomfort.
You can’t have experiences if you don’t trust people
Even if it’s for an hour or a minute, you’re going to have to take a leap of faith if you want to have experiences. If you want to go for a drive, you need to get in someone’s car. If you want to get a surgery done, you need to trust the doctor. Want to travel? You have to take a leap of faith with regards to both the pilot and the airplane. If you want to do anything, you’re going to need to trust somebody. If you don’t have new experiences, you won’t learn anything. You won’t have any memories or knowledge to integrate into a plan of action for your financial future. You can get wealthy working low skilled jobs, but it’s a lot harder.
Not trusting will make you mean
Not trusting people will be inherently difficult. You’ll have fewer relationships, and it’ll be harder to survive. This will cause life to beat you down in other ways, and soon it’ll be very hard to stay positive. You also won’t have had any good experiences in the meanwhile, and that will make you bitter, and you’ll grow old fast. I’ve been grinding for a couple of years, and the effects are showing. It’s all for a better future.
Focus on family
I had a time period where I didn’t trust my family members. I had some bad experiences when I was younger and felt very lonely for a very long time. Over the last three months however, I’ve come to realize how much of an asset my family really is. I’m still discerning, but connecting with the right family members has definitely been beneficial to my life.
Be careful of friendships with other men
Men are very jealous creatures. More jealous than women, in my opinion. The thing about men is that whether or not they admit it, they have a halo around women, and are less likely to be hostile to them offline (I’m obviously talking about in polite society, not private and intimate relationships). This means they have plenty of time to throw their pent up resentment at you. There’s no reason to have male friends who aren’t business partners or an old in my opinion. If you want to talk, stick to family and the occasional homegirl, as far as new people are concerned. It’s possible to have female friends, by the way.
Exit hookup culture
I was out of the hookup culture for a few years, and then made a little foray back in recently. I had some success, but also found that I was pretty rusty. I had nothing in common with the women I was meeting and had completely different interests. That’s when I realized I needed to get to the point where I could move out, and settle down with somebody once I do that. Hookup culture destroys a lot of people’s self esteem, and makes them less trusting of everybody. Even if your game is tight, the more randoms you introduce into your life, the more likely something is to go wrong. Do a stable relationship with the type of woman you want. It might take time, but it’s out there. The healthy way to deal with loneliness is to make real friends. Not just having sex.
All in all, you should trust people. But be careful who you trust and who you associate with. Some people’s minds are in dark places, and can drag you down even if you’re steadfast. That’s why I wrote this article. The battle to trust people is constant, and it can be difficult if you’ve been burned. But it needs to be done.
