If you’re a productive person trying to do interesting things, the odds are high that you have haters and doubters. I wish haters and doubters didn’t exist. You probably also feel the same way. But they do and there’s absolutely nothing we can do about it. So, as an aspiring life coach, I figured writing an article about dealing with haters would be one of the most helpful things I could do for my readers, customers, and clients. Haters are often discussed in popular culture, but people rarely offer solutions. Let me take a stab at it in this essay.
Haters are a part of life
If you’re getting anything done, you’re going to have people looking at what you’re doing with disapproval. It doesn’t matter whether you’re Mother Teresa or the head of the mafia. You can’t please everybody. If you’re outside and active, you’re going to have haters. Accepting that you’re going to have haters can be a tough pill to swallow, especially if you’re conflict-avoidant, but it’s a fact of life that they exist. The sooner you accept this, the better you’ll feel about things.
Never get mad
When you’re interacting with haters, it’s important to never get too angry at them. If you get angry at them, you let them win. You get distracted from your task and create an entertaining scenario for the guy hating on you. Always stay calm when dealing with haters. Never get mad at them. If you feel yourself getting mad, find a way to escape, even if it’s only briefly.
Always be positive
The last thing a hater wants to see is you happy. If you defeat people with love and positivity, you’re going to be very happy, and highly likely to succeed. Being positive is like a two-pronged weapon in your interpersonal arsenal. If you’re positive you can create a better world for both yourself and those around you, all while taking wind out of a hater’s sails. It’s really hard to be a hater while someone else is being positive. If they’re excellent enough, you’ll just look stupid. Fight fire with water. Do your best to radiate positive energy when faced with haters.
Make yourself scare
Don’t spend lots of time around haters. While being positive works well, hater energy will always rub off in the long run. You’re going to want to make yourself scarce around haters. Haters kill your vibe and make it hard to feel good about yourself. This makes it hard to work hard and effectively. You want to avoid haters at all costs. If you’re randomly forced to socialize around haters, be polite and positive, but keep the interactions short and limited.
Don’t share your plans
This is what will create the biggest problem for people. If you share your plans with other people who hate what you’re doing, you’re asking to get shit on at best. Worst case scenario, you get sabotaged. Sometimes it’s best to just keep quiet. Don’t open up or share too much around haters. You’ll only regret it.
Hang out with your cheerleaders
This is one of the most important things you can do for yourself, outside of dealing well with your haters. Hanging out with people who are cheering for you and on your side is essential to coping with negativity. They will put wind in your sails and keep you working hard when things get tough. Finding your cheerleaders is hard, but they are pretty easy to spot. They’re the ones on your side.
Don’t mistake tough love for hate
Some people are not on your side, but others are simply well-meaning but rough. Members of the former group will harm you, but the others will help you and give you advice that others are afraid to. You’ll do well to tell the difference between the two groups. This is why not getting mad also works so well. You’ll avoid pissing off the people who wanted to help you.
Keep working
If you stop grinding, your haters win by default. So don’t stop grinding. This is very simple, but it isn’t easy to do at all. You’re probably going to want to give up a lot of the time. There will be times when you have doubts about what you’re doing, and you wonder whether or not it’s all for nothing. But that doesn’t mean you stop working. Keep going so that you can succeed. Never stop working and never give up. This is the best way to make the haters mad.
The best revenge is to be extremely successful
This is the real truth. People hate to see other people succeed and do better than them. If you’re living a great life without hurting anyone or needing to look over your shoulder, you’re deeply hurting the people who have it out for you.
Dealing with haters and doubters is an important, but annoying part of life. These people are everywhere, and they can unfortunately become very nasty if you let them walk all over you. Don’t. Treat haters and doubters with respect, but make sure you deal with them appropriately, and make every effort to neutralize their influence on your life. If you can do this effectively, you’ll be way ahead of the 90% or more of people who continuously let trolls win.
Thanks for paying attention.
